Cant Let It Go

im thinking back on our past and everything we have been through. every moment has a reason and a purpose. i know i say i hate you, i dont wanna be with you, or even be your friend. little do you know. your who i wannna be with, i love you, and i want you to be my bestfriend. im scared to say it to your face, or even write you a letter. im scared of your reaction or what you might say back. my heart belongs to you, always have. i cant let you go even if it would save me. i look at you and see my husband, the father of my children. you are just like me and im just like you. mom even says we are meant for eachother. Mrs Hjlemstad says we need to forget the drama and work it outt. Still im scared. i just read your status on myspaceee and my heart dropped to my tummy. seeing you fall for someone else,liking someone or even hear you say i love you and my name doesnt follow...i hurt inside. i put up a front to show im strong, my guard is up buh slowly its falling for the love you. i dont know what to do anymorre. i need you. i need us. i need our love.